Slow is sexy
According to an article on Reuters, women find well-mannered men more attractive. There is a new guide to chivalry for men from Debrett’s, the British arbiter of taste.
Speed leads to impatience and rudeness. I want a more civilized world, a world in which manners, consideration for others, and politeness count.
I admit that this SLOW DOWN NOW thing is an ideal. I found myself in the morally reprehensible state of multi-tasking the other day. Sometimes life gets the better of you. But at least I know to be slow.
A slow lifestyle is more polite. Do you rush to go through a door first, or slow down, and take time to stand aside and let someone else go through? Do you let other cars in front of you when driving? When I do this, I often get a friendly wave.
What may be sexy about slow is that it makes time to be considerate of others.
Trying to do too much is the culprit. If I’m thinking of things I must do, I’m not even present. Impatience adds to the sum of minor frustrations that builds up into full-blown grumpiness. The good news is slowing down helps nip grumpiness in the bud.
Look around. You can see the furrowed brow everywhere.
If we are going to treat each other better, we need to slow down. After all, the slow movement is about being more considerate and civilized. Slow down and be more attractive. It seems like a sound idea, but it’s easier said than done.
Don’t you think so?
I love this blog. I am so overwhelmed by blogs that update every darned day. It is just too much info overload.
But this blog updates in a reasonable way, so that I am excited to read what you have to say.
Keep up the great work! (Take your time about it, though. *smile)
Thank you. This is a slow blog after all. There is no point in overdoing it. That would be too much, and too much is more than enough of anything.
I work in one of the busiest cities in the UK. The furrowed brows are indeed manifold! Especially in the most rushy of situations when people are shoving & shunting & almost throwing other people out of the way to get on the train. Everyone likes to sit down, but the rudeness of modern society is focused into an intense miasma at the doors to the train. C’mon, guys & gals, be more polite! Let someone in before you, smile, realise that the positive benefits of being *nice* outweigh those of getting to sit down for 5 or 10 minutes! (and on the particular train journey to which I refer, it does tend to start emptying and freeing up seats after about 10 minutes)
Occasionally a smile breaks through… being of a male heterosexual persuasion, I cannot deny that I am more likely to notice such on an attractive young lady - hey, I’m human! When such a personage smiles, I smile… She is clearly less troubled, less rushy, less !NOW!NOW!NOW! than her surrounding fellow passengers… Tiz joyous to behold… Slowing down produces smiles, but a smile also slows down time…
Slowing down and noticing one’s surroundings and *smiling* at them is indeed the key to a happier life… and a sexier life! I am more likely to want to jump my girlfriend’s bones if she greets me at the door after a hard day’s trying-not-to-work with a smile…
Well shoot, good news for me
There are many things I could say, and they all huddle up at the tip of my fingers waiting for their turn, but I must hold onto slow… to let a few out at a time…
I came upon this website only a few minutes ago, but much space has now been created within me…
I came upon it whilst looking for guidance to help me to not hurry love… I’ve been single for some time (not enough by many peoples standards) and now I find myself rushing into any potential relationship with the hope that it may be the one - the only - and maybe I need to rush now, take the chance, make it happen.
But maybe time’s not ready for me yet. How do I stand back? How do I wait for the one? Can I not do anything to make it hurry up…
I don’t enjoy feeling this way, I want to be slow. I’d like things to flow, to happen in their own time, but I’m too impatient.
Roxy,
I’m not qualified to give advice on matters of the heart but the Supremes sang, “You Can’t Hurry Love.” And there is an old saying, “Marry in haste, repent at leisure.”
It seems you subscribe to the idea of just the right person out there who will make you “feel” a certain way if only you could find him or her. This Romantic notion (with a capital R) is echoed in all sorts of songs. But loving is an act— not really a feeling. Being in love is how Nature programs us to carry on the making the next generation.
It’s tough to just say be more patient, but patients is a virtue. Rushing into anything is problematic. I don’t think anyone can expect to feel good all the time. I’m not even sure that would be good thing if it were possible. Having a relationship with yourself first, that is, being comfortable with who you are, accepting yourself as you are, will probably put you in a better position to relate to someone else in a caring way.
Slowing down is not always easy.
Slowing down can be the hardest thing in the world.
Self-love, however, can *only* be found by discovering your inner stillness.
Make space for yourself and you’ll make space for others, LotA.
Well, maybe just giving yourself a break is enough to avoid perfectionism so that you are being kind to yourself. Then it’s easier to be kind to others.